Its always amicable to have friends who gave honest and brutal feedback. I had a dialogue with Mas Guruh at La Vue, a mentor whom I had worked together at previous company. I always tried to elucidate the truth of what I am thinking and ardent of. I shared to him my plans to create an online lending company, working for a venture capital, My ECOCE fiasco project (coffee bean dealer), and risk management consulting, and also my intention to join corporate strategy function of the group. I shown him a paper about my plans, and he said “A paper won’t solve real problems, its a futile thing if you not execute it”. He was not the first person who said that.
A week before, I shown my plan to my coterie; Nana and Ahong at Hauss Rooftop, Ahong told me that I was too “Nerimo” or “Too Accepting Condition” I accepted His feedback even I felt chafed. Ahong have been progressing a lot. He have been leading Marketing team in Manado, He has plenty wisdom and ambition, He also successfully built his venture: Property construction, Forex trading, and Bank note trades. His incitement for being entrepreneur was so contagious. Nana is Lead Business development team in a Hongkong based Life insurance firm. It was an enchanting financial service coterie gathering, we just need a Banker and Lawyer to make the meeting more exciting going forward.
A month before I had a Diner at Kitchenette at Plaza Indonesia with a mentor who used to be an ex-Investment Banker, he said “A paper won’t solve real problem, focus on customer pain points”. He offered to join his endeavor for a venture creation. A week later, I also offered to handle trading for a Coffee endeavor, and I said that i unable to take it now for both of them, but I gonna think about it.
Given to that three evidences, I do need to focus on what I am good at and focus on what I will do seriously. I think its about my Integrity and my Point of Different among me and my friends, I believe if I decided to jump in, it must be with a “full force”. I believe that I have Grit and tenacity to achieve what I wanted to be.
I glad that my friends has awaken me on what I must do; to avoid doing too many thing with no result,moseying around too many initiatives; instead of doing 1 or 2 thing in a full force.These conversations, even debilitated my vision, was so helpful to gauge my plans by delete or delay non-urgent thing. focusing my resource (Time, Capital, and Network) for thing that matter the most.
“Action is not equal to result”.
I tend to be traped in Analysis Paralysis; overthinking; focusing on long term about what happen on US, Europe, China, India, which not many people think its an urgent matter; instead of focusing on present. it also not synced with company objectives. I also work out of my function and give my non office hour to do the job. even I Know, those information will help me in my future role, the temptation must be controlled. I feel that it is imperative to take a deep breath, focus on what I can do based on the role given excellently, Invest my resource to things which the result can be measured, reduce my long term view which not in line with the organization objectives. the capability of control desire to explore seems gonna rescue me in a time of crisis.
It was on early 2010 when I wrote this story, it is important for me to reminisce that I ever tried to work for Sinarmas Bank, Traveling with economy train, and had a luminary Father (He passed away, 9 years ago at October 23rd 2008). I slightly repair the note to remember his persistence, fortitude, and humility for raising me and my brothers as a single father; It is a boon for me as one of his pedigree.
Once upon a time, I went to Jogja for three days to attend an Management Development Program test for Bank Sinarmas at Boston School of Banking. I went there by a travel, I never went to Yogyakarta by myself, it stopped at Kaliurang. I stayed in Jogja for 3 days at my niece’s Dorm, she was being a billiard athlete. On the test day, I passed the Psycho-test and Focus Group Discussion session and will be invited for interview test with the Board in the following week.
On the third day, I decided to return to Surabaya by economy train, it only spent IDR 26K; much cheaper than by travel which priced IDR 100k. At 8.30 PM, My Niece took me to the station by her Shogun bike, We were so starving, We didn’t eat anything since afternoon, We took diner in front of Universitas Gajah Mada, We talked about Jogja’s vibrant life, I said to her that it would be interesting if I were choosing Jogja as place for my undergrad, given the fact that I had spent four years live in Malang, “so pity” she said.
Tingtong 9.30 pm. Finally, We arrived at Lempuyangan, the economy train station. I saw an expat (Bule), age around 40, He was sat in front of station stair, He seems upset. I wasn’t bravely talk to Him, I thought it was so uncommon, an expat to took an economy class. Fortunately I was able to speak in English. I started to collect my bravery, then finally I asked him questions and starting a conversation. His name was Drake, A Finnish who traveled to Jogja alone for seeing Borobudur and Prambanan since he was bored with his friends who only interested to had a diving on Lombok.
Our topic was about “how to pick an appropriate women to accompany our life until the last breath”, Sounds interesting, (but i forgot on how to pick an appropriate women tips). it was a heavy topic at that time, He told a serious story about his life, how did he met his wife, how hard to earn money to pay childbirth, how he pay for school tuition. I was touched, I thought that I must be a strong man. even I was still 21 years old.
His story reminded me on how unswerving my father’s endeavor to raise me and my brothers, for 9 years as a single father of three, commuting daily Bangil – Surabaya, departing 6 AM and return by 6PM, Pay for house bills, tuition, pocket money. even on weekend he also clean our home, I don’t know how did he manage all those thing alone for 9 years since my mother passed away. We bought foods almost everyday since none of us able to cook, except noodle and some recipe from Kartini Magazine, which my mother subscribed when she was alive on 1996-1997. What I admired from my Father are He always gave me the best part of the food, while He just ate the rice and gave me the fried fish, He always reminds me to “be unpretentious, be grateful on what is given, and be cheerful even when You sad”.
It is an inextricable part of my life for adjusting dreams. My Dream in high school, was to be a barber, inspired by Takuya Kimura’s Film, In College, was to work in Brand Management. Now? The reality is am I living in Jakarta, working at a corporation, earned an MBA, lived overseas. Can you gauge my dream deviation and standard of error? Now, I have curiosity on Venture Capital.
I believed on Allah’s blessing, for always showing me path through many serendipity. Anand Krishna which taught me of the importance of respecting diversity, Djenar M. Ayu which tell me the exoticism of Jakarta, and an event in University of Indonesia in 2008, called Youth and Multicultural Conference, seared my ambition to be able to deliver speech without text in public.
I met many inspiring individual who changed my perspective of how big a desire should be and triumph it. I met friends from Strategy Consulting Firms, Investment Bank, Venture Capital, Private Equity and Tech Startup; I met mentors who shared me their wisdom on how they get into their position, I felt aspired of what they do.
Last Monday, I visited a Toastmaster at Menara Imperium, A speech by Reggy.H, He said “If your desire is not scared you, its not big enough”. He reminds me the importance of balancing Idealism VS Realism and being proud of yourself as a tools to distinguish you from others. if you don’t have pride, you don’t have character. I was imbued to find and tame beast within me.
Do you do what You wanted to do? Do you aspired of what You do?
first – A realism
I felt blessed on my job, learning new skills in enterprise risk management, marketing, and networking opportunity in HQ and Business Unit. the role is not scare me to death, probably since it still my 3rd months, (still) limited knowledge, and a transition from working in 4th gear into 2nd gear, and euphoria of worked in multiple departments. but like my previous boss said, “There will be a time when you being put at Kawah Chandra di Muka, and when you be there, what you do is deliver the best, be the best Kid“, I think its a good time for me to enjoy the role, since i would have more time to do my what’s next.
Second – an Idealism
I like to work in Project Management, Business Development, Investment, and Marketing; roles that I passionate and I believe i can be my best. I feel that a role in a VC is fit for me. People said, compared to folks who have corporate finance background and graduated overseas would be have higher chance to be hired, given that most PE and VC in Indonesia funds are generated by overseas graduated, is it an indicator that I must go to West Coast?
Third – The Middle Ground
Wise man said “Grit, focus, and perseverance” is a key to get what we wants. Not all the things we truly want can be easily get. I have a hallow voice, a beast; spoke to me “it is very close if you bravely jump out”, but the steadiness also thwart me to jump out. The older we are, the more we become risk averse. to conclude, if no one from my elementary school eligible to enter the most prestigious high school in my district and get full scholarship in college, if no one from my college able to enter the big company and sent overseas, If no local boy able to enter a VC, Could I?
There’s positive and negative impact of owning car, my friends asked me; why I don’t purchase car; I still do not have budget to own the car that i wanted to have, handling Insurance Premium, Maintenance, and Administration cost. I heavily rely on Jakarta Public transportation, especially online motor and car hailing, my favorite is Grab and Uber for Car, those two provides decent discount, My Favorite for motor is Go-Jek since it always provides masks both face and hair. These service was never existed two years ago, and it has changed my transportation preference.
If People said Jakarta is left behind compared to neighbor country such as Singapore and Hong Kong, yes it does, but I have faith soon it will change, at least by 2019.
I kvetching why the infrastructure project development has caused traffic become crippled, especially around SCBD, Mampang, and Matraman. I feel it since for last three months I frequently work in AI WTC Office. Transjakarta has becoming solution of the problem, its extensive networks now is better than 7 years ago; I used to take Transjakarta from UKI Cawang to Pasar Rebo; then I change transport with Kopaja 510 or Metromini 509 to go to my prior Office at TB Simatupang.
Here some tips on how to use Transjakarta:
Purchase e-money by alternative Bank; the price of e-money is IDR 40.000 (USD 3), it contained IDR 20.000. (I hope i can be e-money provider; at least those who use it in early morning and after hour are mostly fixed income segment, the white collar who lived in Jakarta, Bekasi, Cileduk). the most interesting part is the tariff is flat, IDR 3500 per trip to anywhere.
Make Sure to have plenty of time, last Wednesday, I planed to attend Toastmaster class at SCBD on 7 PM; 18KM distance. by 6 PM I arrived at ITC Cempaka Putih Shelter, it took 15 minutes to wait TJ 2A; which go straight to Senayan; but it got stuck in Senen Tunnel, for 30 minutes; I arrived at Senen Shelter by 7 PM. meaning I canceled the class. I knew that was my fault to use TJ, next time I will spare 2 hours ahead, or I use Gojek then stop at Harmoni Shelter, I believe the waiting time will be less than 5 minutes. I expect Government should adds more TJ to reduce waiting time.
Make Sure Sit at the right seat and be ready to stand on rush hour, I was too tired at the time and I was sit at woman only seat, and every eyes on me, I thought its due to my affable face, but seems i sit at pink marked seat. during rush hour at 5 – 7 PM, TJ is like a Human Fridge, you can smell various odors, natural and artificial. and make sure you put your bag or purse in front of your body.
I think government is quite fast for developing LRT and MRT which will be done by 2019 I am a believer of “centralization”, that people will return to the center; which I saw it in Hong Kong and Singapore, that transporation is becoming a central role of urban living. So If you wanted to purchase property, it must be in the center, not go too far into Serpong, BSD, Bekasi, or the newly developed The Meikarta, (but now i fall in love with Sentul City – I think its an exception to have a small cottage there with a mountain view). I realize living in the center is expensive, but it is a strong motivation to strive harder, go beyond everyone expectation, and Invest on your Skill.
September 2017 marked my end period to work for FIFGROUP the most profitable multifinance in Indonesia, an IDR 2 Trillion and IDR 33 Trillion by Asset company, as a Business Development. September marked my 7 years staying out of my comfort zone, 6 years living in Jakarta and 1 year in Hong Kong, has been changing lots of my unproductive behaviors, such as; afraid to speak up my aspirations; too perfectionist, and lack of empathy.
Factor I believed affect my perspectives was by working at FIFGROUP, a company that i barely known 7 years ago (especially What Business Are They In); a moment where i was fizzled, obscured, on what i will do after graduation from college in Malang. I wrote, because I wanted to thank FIFGROUP for imbuing me with enormous opportunities; Knowledge and understanding about the richness, diversity, opportunity of Indonesia, the importance of determination and perseverance for achieving dreams “Wujudkan Impianmu” , being mentored and coached by luminaries leadership figures in multifinance sector. and the most important is it taught me some transferable skills such as:
Teamwork; I was a believer that I must become the best, but that perspective not totally correct, I learned about how to run together happily the Hamburger Theory “taught me that we must be careful not to hurt others feeling by always saying good things about them” (by Pak IDP) and never afraid to ask question to the right person (By Pak SHT), and do not make my self seems so exclusive (Pak APR).
Excellence, Striving to be the best, it reminds me of Pak HSM, as my mentor he reminds me that my track records which always achieved highest result in school and college has affected my behavior to become a perfectionist, and sometimes its hinders me to accept the fact that I gonna be less affable, since not all people are perfectionist and have a willingness to be pushed forward beyond their normal speed.
Achieving, the spirit to achieve what we planed and triumph it, or called militant spirit is so engendered, a company which 10 years ago only made $10 Million has been transformed into $150 Million, I learned lots of opportunities to craft Strategy, from Porter 5 Forces, PESTEL, VRIO, SWOT, Budgeting, Project Management from Pak JJU. Created New Product Financing for FIFGROUP, which I learned a lot on how to create partnership with company such as PT.ANTAM, Leading team across department in HQ and Branches, and achieved targeted sales plan. It wont be a successful endeavor if my best boss by far (Ms.SME) was not give me trust, support, and back up to execute all the plan and my co-partner (Mr.RMP)
Moving Forward; means to continuously Innovate, I really appreciated opportunities given by Bu RAP, Pak JJU, Pak RGU, and Pak WAT, who gave me opportunities to join FIFGROUP innovator team in 2015 (Me-Roar – DNH) and also 2017 (One thing team – SAD). a very special thanks to Bu RAP and Pak IGJ, who gave me opportunity to partner with the most beautiful lady in BD department, Ms. SMI, to attend Innovate Jardines in Hongkong on March 2017, and also Bu RAP and Pak SBT who give me opportunity to Join BD Team in 2016.
I really indebted to FIFGROUP, Astra and Jardines, on various opportunities they gave to me, 7 years ago, a never thought about what M&A, Investment Banking, Strategic Consulting Firm, and Tech Startup; currently i really interested to learn about those role, especially Corporate Venture Capital. i just wondering, one day, Astra can have a very strong venture capital arm, such as Google Venture, GDP Venture, Northstar, or Toyota AI Venture.
I think I am not independent, I still unable to get what i want, anytime i want. that’s my definition of independent. that might be too plain definition. but life is a process to get what we want, what we deserve, and have determination to do all the things required to achieve it.
so for the sake of gets me Independent, i always try to do what i have plan, which during last 8 months i’ve been doing some improvement for accelerate my independence endeavor:
More Run, but Slower Pace
I did 4 marathons (Sentul, Tokyo, Tahura, Bandung) for last 8 month of 2017. and I grateful that i have a self determination, to finish all of that, however, My Strava indicates my speed is getting slower. my fastest Marathon was 5 hour 11 minutes, but my latest result in Bandung, was 6 hour 30 minutes. my pace degradation is an early warning for me to train harder. but the funny part is i stop smoking since early 2017, but hypothetically my pace should be higher right? but the fact is different with expectation.
More Skills to Learn, becoming A Shapeshifter
2017 is a fanciful year. I worked in business development since September 2016; my job involving create new product for the company and being lead by the best boss that i ever work with, she is smart and back me up when shit happen; then in June 2017, I transferred to the Group HQ in North Jakarta, overseeing all financial services, and force me to learn about risk management. since in this current role my new boss my job is such a lubricant, or oil. I just wondering how to become the best oil? I still in a transition period from being engine for growth into an Oil. my new organization is in an endeavor to becoming on of biggest financial conglomerates in Indonesia; and i just a part of it, so hopefully i can be a world class oil, i think the best oil is still Shell.
From South to North
I hate north Jakarta. I love south Jakarta. given the fact that i’ve been living in Kelapa Gading for last 3 months, I love south jakarta more. i just cant wait to move to south by early of 2018. the water quality is poor, little bit salty. and I miss my routine in Coffeewar, tahu telor Fatmawati, and Senayan.
So given the fact i still live in North while I want to live in south, its a strong indicator that i am not independent, the company still have power to drive me go to the office.