delayed school; new purpose; and new girl (maybe)

within these quartile, i meant, second quartal of 2013. i’ve been in-out into several clubs in jakarta. and i am happy for doing that, even its also had trobled my living budget. its fine though, since i also learn and of course have some fun, dancing and met new people.

from people with straight character, into lines character. from ladies loves ladies, form man kissed man. something that i had only read on one novel called lelaki terindah, which i read in my senior high school library. something that i never known until now, i see it in front of my eyes.

i also lil bit changed my dress style, haircut also, and in turns, had lied me into a condition (around 2 months ago) in colours surabaya, from a girl who asked me “are u straight or lines” and last month into the same club, the GRO (who is finally considered to be lines) treat me so much drinks when he was serving some amsterdam expatriate who visits surabaya. i dont said that i am kinda guy who is attractive for men, but probably its due to my style which lead to that perceptions.

but its oke, i do believed that during 2013, i said into my self, that i gotta change. (not to change my sexual preference of course), i must changed into someone who is more extrovert, more communicative, and dare to try new things. since i finally realise, that i used to be a too serious, too much thinking, and lil humour, something that i dont like. of course, i like to joke, have fun, and met new people. so, in the second quarter, i started to be honest into my self , who i am. sounds arrogant huh?

i dont wanna have those tittle though. i just wanna be who i am.

so, my #1 purpose: keep growing my self and be who i am

THe Delayed School:

last week, i got an email from PMBS that telling me, 28 batch just canceled to be started by june 16. due to DIKTI’s decision to fit PMBS schedule with all Graduate school schedules. so, i got my plan; lil bit messed up. i said that by june, i will stop the party, and disco-ing weekend, and focus on my study. now, i still gets confused, on what i gotta do until october. so, i started new ambition, which are: a. join jakarta marathon on october

b. improve my social skills through meet new friend

c. strengthen my english

d. learn chinese (since i was met beautiful chinese, but i cant understand her)

so, if i have priorities, seems marathon, will be my Next Big project on the third quarter. and chinese language, i still dont have any idea how to develop it.

new girl (maybe)

on early april, i Broke up with ninik, women who really treat me earnestly never asking to much, and loyal to me. its hard nowadays to find that kind of women. it was a HUGE decision in my life. how could i just broke with someone who already more than 7 years i knew ( i met her on 2006), and intensely for 5 years, and broke with no reasons. but, its my decision, i do believe there’s no third party in our relationship. i just tryna to understand my life, am i the right one for her, at this moment. but, honestly, no one can treat me like she did. yes she really is. i hope i wont regret my decision. since its really part of my process to be more mature. i hope this decision will lead us into brighter future. since a big decision, always followed by a new big thing; but we dont even know, whats gonna come, bad or good.

a new girl maybe, an ex girlfriend with new mindset, or a new girl with exactly new perspective.

and it will be my last.

 

coffewar, june 08,13.

rain outside, and just hot chocolate, and famous dji samsoe, on the table.

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