on set thing up

I have been wandering to a question:

“what i must do to accelerate my self, for achieving what I’ve been dreaming of?

I am grateful, I just turned into 28, I felt nothing I can be proud of, but some friends told me that I’ve been doing things that has changed me into what I am now. It started  8 years ago, when I day dreamed to work in Jakarta and took best business school in Indonesia on my University library, and i am reading SWA magazine, I even i worked in biggest conglomeration which had been send to Hong Kong for exclusive trainee program with those who studied in top university in UK, US, and Singapore, those who had widen my perspective on seeing the world.

I had finished 2 marathons for last 4 months in Bali and Jakarta. and put world 7 marathon as my next target before i turned into 40. and be able to do triathlon under 30. I really into this endurance race. but i must reconsider of being champion, since i am not the fastest. but given the race result at least i always at the top of 30% participant. not the best in class yet.

I am grateful, surrounded by inspiring friends and mentors who indirectly pushed me and notified me to keep track on my goals and achievements. even some said i tend to be picky for befriend with people, but that’s not true, because i believe that I will be genuinely interested to go out if we both have chemistry, I do not want to push such kinda boring relationship but with no interesting content to be talked about. i realized that I am not interesting, but at least I know  and can feel those whom i really befriend with, is really genuine. i really do not agreed with artificial friendship.

The problem lies on what next, I felt that with the fast paced changes both in the real and business world, i need to foster my competitive advantage than my peers, where not only taking technical skills but also leadership capability.

During last 2 years, this strength has been dulling, I rarely use it, where I tried to be imperfect and not demanding. for example,  I tried to avoid some responsibilities which the idea initiated by me. My last business school project, the idea was from me, but i was not taking the leadership role, and gave it to my friend. My Innovator team project in 2015, i also given up the responsibility to other team,  and probably the last was on coffee project, where i should taking the responsibility to steer the wheel.

My last personal appraisal, my leader gave special spotlight on my leadership skills, where I assigned  to grind down my capacity to lead a team, even there still no direct line that I must control, but I do agreed with her statement.

I tried to give example of my negligence:

  1. not able to listen carefully –> during meeting with people more than 10, i always lead the meeting and sharing the purpose, and keep track on all of the conversation, but sometimes i miss interpret on what people saying, i think this is because of when people explain his thoughts, i always nodding my head, it seems to show that i am understand what he is talking about, but honestly i do not get the idea, or the eye contact was too long and I unable to figure out quickly what i wanted to say to counter the conversation; not effective. What I must do? i think i need to not pretend that i understand (with risking people will say that i am not quick learner) but we don’t know what we don’t know. i must be able to be in present moment, not too much thinking on what i must do next in conversational context.
  2. Bad Writing habit –> since i lead the meeting and make sure everyone  grab the ideas, sometimes in some conversation, and when trying to make notes after meeting, i spent 3 hours, to rewrite, and to understand my own writing, i also record the meeting with my phone, to make sure i am not loss the points, and as you know rewrite and re-listen voice, is hell taking lot of time and energy. i think i can do it better by restate the meeting notes before meeting ends. but i really like to write, but i hate my own writing, its really difficult to read, but if better writing can be a goal, i will choose it as my near future goal.
  3. Come with an empty handed idea – no concept to bring onto the table. it was content of my conversation with my mentor within company, that an officer role is to bring concept and prove that it works; and that made him reach his current position. I am totally agreed on the concept thing. but that my weakness, during last 4 months, I do not comes up with a concept, i tend to brainstorm, on what best idea to be applied by absorbing everyone solution. it has weakness that those that I asked for contribution, sometimes do not know what they are doing. Collaboration seems will be effective if everyone legitimately represents their skills. A friend told me, when you come to me, what your concept? I said to him, that i do not have concept, I came to him to ask for what he did, as an expert. at the moment, I felt embarrassed. I laughed, and said to him that i wanted to learn from him, even later on he explain his things, I totally do not like the word selection that he use to encounter me. and then, I have a peer to compete with now. which means, I must show what am i capable of in a subtle and eloquence way; things that i called flanking attack. I like this adrenaline rush.
  4. Not tracking my project –> this is also my biggest fault, for the last 1 year, i always using short term management, (depend on luck and serendipity, rarely involving other people, it works for single operations) but it totally doesn’t work, especially if you have partner who is such a watchdog where his appearance unpredictable and distracting, and of course that’s not my direct line, but peers, and i don’t like it in professional way. thus from now on, i must taking the responsibility to rule my own project. i do not want to be cocky, but i must believe that my capability is far beyond my friend.

That are my negative list for professional way, but i also facing some negative list for my social live:

  1. priority management –> currently i involved in two hobby project, where it has taken plenty of my after office time. made me literally return by 12 am. It has risking my sleeping time reduced, I had known the consequences, I had fixed schedule for team meeting on Tue, Wed, and Sat. but it seems that plenty distraction during the meeting process must be reduced. to remain effective, i think i should be more discipline on how many hours i must spend to meet them. I don’t even have time to read books with the reason that i do not have proper writing desk in my boarding house.
  2. Health management –> I rarely have time for long distance run now, and getting more sloppy by only run for 10 minutes in gym. in addition my smoking habit get worse, it just so quick to spend 1 pack during my side project meeting, kinda chain smoker community here.
  3. Finance Management –> I felt that i quite discipline in this matter, but i still need to improve, by reducing my credit card savvy behavior into cash basis or prepaid card, thanks for go pay which makes me easier to manage my bill. and RDN account that makes me unable to cash out my asset easily.
  4. Live Shelter –> December is one of pivotal moment in my life Journey, for the first time in my life, i allocate my weekend to decide which location that i wanna live in, i had been touring to Depok, Ciputat, Pamulang, Pondok Labu, Bintaro, and Cinere. I even calculate the number of redlight, and probabilities of traffic during weekdays and weekend, and facilities surrounding the location.  if the location is above 15km from TB simatupang, the housing price still below 1 Billion IDR, but in Cinere the price has reached 1 Billion and thats very small. while apartment still priced below 1 Billion in Cinere, so decided to apply housing loan from bank, where i don’t know whether it approved or not. the interesting part on my endeavor to search housing is, finally I know the price of house in Fatmawati, Kemang, and Cinere, the location that i wanted to live in priced around 2-6 Billion. I just falling love with South Jakarta. but given the fact that i don’t have sufficient fund by the time i am writing this note, I think it’s good for me to keep my ambition to have a proper home in South Jakarta before i get 35. and it made me things to figure out, what disruptive solution to make me able to have it?

My Problems sounds so materialistic, it ended up with my inability to purchase the housing that i wanna be into, to live in present. Most of time, my desire, aspirations, and appetite is beyond what i have now; even for female things that i truly picky. but that has empower me to do more, that’s the energy to move me beyond my comfort condition which i already grateful on what I got. If i am not seeing the sky, I never know how far i can fly. I too much seeing ground lately, being too grateful with what i had, but seeing the price of property, I must work hard to achieve this. by collaborate with right partner, prioritizing on things that important, and sharpen my technical and strategic capability.

it still long way to go, i wishing to live until age 80, still 52 years to go. what happening during last 7 years, i felt so grateful. but i must reach my potential.

Bruno Mars.

Dancing With another Man

Coffeewar, December 26th 16:11 PM.





Stand on my ground

it was my biggest mistake when i always trying to do what i do not wanted to do. for the last 3 months, some big things that i think i must  take A decision, then i changed into B decision due to i tried to please other people, even i do not fully embrace the idea.

This afternoon, my friend told me that he is insecure of his relationship with woman he had been partnering with for years. and i intensively share what i thought to my friend and try to absorb his solution. what i always remember is that he said i need affirmation of my decision, even i share my decision, it doesn’t mean my ultimate decision changed. his insecurity seems affecting his suggestion towards me; creating bias that shouldn’t be don’t by a mentor.

frequently some hunch come across and i didn’t follow it; i do regret why i am not following my intuition; where these intuitions have been guiding me in to get what i wanna get, and be what i wanna be.

some senior folks also reminds me that i must not try to not being my self.

it seems like i do not know what i wanna do and get, i unable to envision my future. i believe it will be more adventurous but plenty risks to overcome.

what i need is to become my self. even some friend told me that i am blunt and genuine, but i feel like i not say what i wanna say, not do what i wanna do. it seems like the brain trapped in a body. I must change.

I must change, I must change, I must change, I must change, I must change.

the positive energy that wakes me up every morning and make me hustle along the day, seems gone. but i must find my true self as fast as possible, by listen more to my intuition. in my thinking process and mindset.

I must have positive energy, positive energy, positive energy.

I must have self motivation, an urge to achieve more.

I believe that i can do what i wanna do, and be what i wanna be. and i dont wanna be or mimicking someone else.

Please Lord, guides me to become a genuine me. A man who stand on his ground, with convincing way of speaking and step.

Jakarta, November 15 2019.

Playing in same battlefield!

Pivot is the most frequent word i heard for last one month. based on Merriam Webster, “the action of turning around a point : the action of pivoting”. it seems a huge force inside of me that i wanna change something inside me. but i don’t know what exactly i must change. I felt it driven by my curiosity.

I was struck by “What Got You Here Won’t Get You There” by marshal goldsmith. change is inevitable, but what should i change if I don’t know what I must change?

During  twelve months in Hong Kong. I met and be friend with many people, they are around 5-10 years above me, French, Polish, Italian, British, Hong Kong, Germanic, Dutch, India, Cambodian, Chinese (Ningbo, Shenzen, Beijing, and Shanghai) Korean (Seoul and Busan), Australian (Sidney), San Fransisco, Boston, New York, Singaporean, where i met them in the Company, Club, and Founder Institute Hong Kong.

It is beyond what I had ever dreamed; I can interact with diverse people; i felt thrilled and I felt like I really can be Me, without I try to pleased anyone. maybe it is also part of my last month topic, about an urgency for me to really stand on my ground, and put a strong defense on what I thought and aspired.

I felt, what i learned is just mediocre things compared to what they had learned; seen, and accomplished. In some social event, i felt that my topic is about Indonesia, while their topic about the world. and it increase my curiosity to see them too.

How to go there? how to get more money? work hard? really?

Now i am thinking about working hard is the underlying factor that i must do, but there’s some connection of what these people doing, they are in financial service sector and very well connected, people knows people.  most of them in Venture capitals, Multinational Banks, Investment banks, and Hedge Fund. I also in Financial service too. same game, but different battle field. I played in Indonesia and they played Asia pacific or world.

Someday, I will play in a same battlefield with them

to achieve that, i must have a burning desire and specific things to improve. yeah I will play in same battlefield with them. its a must. Allah bless me, to reach that point.

Coffeewar, October 16th 2016

Tears in Heaven, Eric Clapton


Carry ON

Hong Kong Founder Institute – Spring Program

I knew Founder Institute 2 years, ago when i was in final year in prasetiya mulya business school. i interested to join a start-up community, but fortunately my company assigning me to Hong Kong, to learn Mandarin and Accounting.and last winter, i attended introduction session, and decided to join to make my time in Hong Kong “more” fruitful; out of previously I already plan to help one of my mentor, create a business plan about coffee. and what a godsend, i accepted to join the program.

It was amazing experience since i expended my time to learn about create a business idea to be implemented. unfortunately i dropped out a month ago, I only attended 10 meeting out of 14. during this program, my idea was  coloni.  a marketplace to provide directly sourced Indonesia coffee. I dropped out because there’s a requirement to establish a company in Hong Kong. where i found it will derail me from my purpose of being in Hong Kong. but I think, being part of it is truly the best experience by far.


Mentor Idea Review II

what I admired for long time is working collaboratively with friend from different country. i know that my company, is a multinational company with Asia focus. but i have desire to work people from diverse countries, education background, and language. and FI Hong Kong is the best place to learn.

during the learning, i also met passionate and insightful directors, which helps me a lot during my learning process, such as Leo Ku, Andrea, and Jeff broer, and inspiring mentor such as Derek Kwik a venture capitalist, who gave me plenty and detailed feedback, from presentation, idea communication, even deck; even he is so busy, he still have time for early morning meeting, to adjust towards my schedule since i need to work at the airport. Devin Ehrig, a venture capitalist, who give a lot of feedback about my coffee business, since he used to be doing his business about trading blue mountain coffee when he was in Hawai, also suggest me to create a legal entity in country where my business should be located, Indonesia. Amit Chattergie who gave me insight of how to make cafe experience into my website.

during the learning process, we also need to change group, i have different group each months.

My first Group

during the first month, what i learned mostly about Idea generation and customer development. where i did research about customer needs and want. but one thing most important also team dynamic, since we never know each other, but must working together and have regular meeting. we usually meet at coffee academics as confluence point.

our Idea ranging from translation service, health care, web development,calendar, and coffee (which is mine)


Brown Group

my second group

During this session, me and marco drop out, since both of us not finish to create a company. in this session, i did many first time experience: create my first website on my self. our idea ranging from Neighborhood, calendar, integrated insurance, and parking apps. we usually choose Holly Brown as confluence point. majority of us come from financial service. one thing I really missed about this group is they really give me plenty of constructive feedback and support.


Blue Group


finally, on Monday 18, only 7 graduated from 25 participant. its totally true that only those who persevere able to finish. its really enchanting moment to see my friend graduated. I hope i also can finish what i start like they did. i hope i wont lost thrust to keep on learn and implement my ideas.


FI Spring 2016 graduation night

lesson learned by FI program:

  1. Focus on customer needs. i really need to met customer, doing interview, and mentoring, something that i usually only doing on internet. this new behavior, hopefully will give me a new capability to reach anyone anytime. it also one of my handicap since the gap between indonesia and hong kong is too far on customer behavior. in here people using nescafe Pod dolce gusto in their home, and easy to find out freshly roasted coffee, also i unable to bring my product to make customer experience it. (so now i understand customer experience and feedback loop is imperative)
  2. Be passionate and Authentic; something that you really wanted to build from scratch and you will persevere to do for minimum 10 years. (i still not know my passion, this is also the reason i read plenty self development books). this things still being my problem, but during the FI process, i met various mentors who gave me some insight on what should i do, search, and develop.
  3. Be Fast, where it also shown by creating MVP, or minimum viable product. what i learned from theory, and work experience is we must be perfect in front of customer, but in here, perfection slow things down. and it influenced the way i worked, i put a new thing in my mindset that perfection slow me down, let makes imperfection as a way for us to gain a feedback loop.
  4. Team Dynamics: be on time, speak up, be present, and respect to others opinion. i learned it a lot during my study at PMBS, FIFgroup, and in here what different is working together and maintain good communication with multi countries friend. where i thing it is the most luxurious thing i got by far.
  5. Think BIG, International – i used to think only about Indonesia. but in Hong Kong, it designed to rule the world, or at least Asia. where i doing deep research about world coffee industry, players, and recent changes. where i found really helps me see through US and china market.
  6. Persevere; most of graduates, are very inspiring, they have energy sparked from their eyes, i think those are the eye of founders. they also have high degree of confidence.
  7. Be prepared, Practice, Practice, Practice: during my early learning process, i though i don’t need to practice, but there’s a session called hot seat, a 60 second pitch to convey our ideas. also mentor idea review where most of prominent mentor evaluate our idea in 90 second. also never be late, since customer wont wait you, if you failed to deliver, you are done. so this is important that i must never miss any schedule.
  8. Hong Kong efficient legal process. to create a company in Jakarta, you will need two directors, and await for 30 days. in hong kong you only need 5 days maximum. (it also shown that we need to be better as Indonesian), and cost wise, in Hong Kong is cheaper.
  9. Start-up accelerator program – in here i learn about how the curriculum, and content of class being managed. i have curiosity to learn about start up, where i only read on book, but during this spring, i being part of it, even not graduated (but i wont be languished by that – its a fun experience).

overal my spring in Hong Kong, is exciting, strenuous, many serendipity, many people helps me out, both in Hong Kong and Jakarta. I really apologize for my futility, that i dropped out of the program merely for legal reason. but I believe my decision is well thought. congratulation for your new endeavor guys.

Royal Terrace. QB




what you will be for the next 10 years?

an intriguing question, by a mentor where green mountain coffee are from, a venture capital consultant, at a Bar around Wan Chai,

I replied by i wanna be a strategy consultant, venture capitalist, or entrepreneur, a job that makes me interact with many inspiring people that will make me inspired, always moving and improving, I have a faith, along my life, i learned from people whom i believed distinguished than the others.

if i reflect into my plan 5 years ago, my aspiration was being a Branding and marketing consultant.the fact i am doing operations, and marketing for last 5 yeras. i just know that the coolest thing in this world, is what Pak Hermawan Kertajaya said on Markplus, finally i get a picture with him on 2014, at Ubud. He is my Rock Star.

Now, it shift, into company such as  McKinsey, Standford, Harvard, Y combinator, Wall Street Journal, Google Venture, where i read many literature related to those cool place, and i met and have conversation with some people who was there, and that people, is fakin awesome, Innovative, and risk taker. the gap of knowledge, speed, and capability, is still far below, this always make me paranoid of not being able to catch up.

the perjalanan, masih panjang. i think live is such a business model, our value proposition, keep evolved, in accordance with the customer segment #Leanbusinessmodel

so I asked, how you be in this position? what makes you become you are now?

he also told about his stories about his journey, meeting inspiring people, through serendipity, that his friend introduce him to a friend, which is an owner of a company, and those guy asked to join the company, and he took the challenged, and his life changed into more exciting life, but it need process.

then, we both agreed that, by meeting more people, the right people, right moment, and right purpose, we will find the path, on what we are good at, and what we can do to help people based on our strength.

but at the end he wanted me to think clearly before i replied. he said you still don’t know what you wanna become yet, but keep asking and questioning.

i crave for trying and learning many things, I felt, i am loosing time. but i always enjoy to be crave, it makes me sleep late on night, and wanna wake up as early as possible. I bet, my mind don’t wanna waste of my time here.

Journey to Find out what we are good at; most of it? a serendipity

Character Reading; a fingerprint approach.

a month ago i met a Hong Kong Friend, the owner of Miqimiqi, she has specialized skills on reading fingerprint, she read my ten finger nails, and said my character is complex, combination of Dog, Bat, Cat and Peacock.

Dog as outside, shortly means that i easily mingle with people, but inside, i am a Bat, where bat always at the sky, hanging with the head looking from top, makes me has character of reverse thinking and see things more above, broad, and quickly analyze things, which makes my thought can not easily being accepted by people.i always need spoke person to convey or consult about my idea, (this is the role of my greatest friend Bagus (c), Rey (m) , Posma (e) , Sarra (m), Immanuel (m), Vincent (e), Albert (c), Nana (c)), I am fortunate, to have friend who can help me during my life, and constantly give feedback.

  • e = engaged
  • m= married
  • c = complicated

I also a Cat, who like fashion, and Peacock, which always try to be different. based on her research i will be good if i pursue something related to human capital on talent management, fund manager, and project management. that my capability is doing something that not yet happen for now. she even able to state that i got allergy on protein.

Laid back, and dont rush! if you are stress, you will not productive.

I met a combodian-french friend, in his life, he always dealing about luxury life. we talked about life and how is it life to dealt with high net worth individual. it was enchanting conversation, but at the essence, he suggest me not to be too stressful to achieve any plans. when we stress, we will do anything what it takes, but most of time, it is not working. the logic was when u doing hard, you will get the result. he suggest me to try best, but keep on balance between being playful, i think his suggestion has wisdom, that when we stress, our face and behavior, and our internal chemical system, is not shine. so, be playful, be funny. what i like for my name is FAHMI; its a combination between FAK-ME, and FAH-NY, so i am so funny, lets funk me. :). i really happy when my friend said i am idiot, especially when i making fun of my own name, but i like being idiot, no people will bother about idiot question. 🙂 have fun!

Speak Up!!!, and ask question, be curious.

In my life, i used to be seldom to speak what i wanna speak, just keep it, and share it to small number of friend that i trusted.

but in corporate life, this things is not working well, I was so scared to convey my aspiration, because most of my comment tend to hurt other people in a subtle way, especially if i give feedback, probably because i usually the youngest on the room, or too conceptual, or not come from cool education background, also the risk of being boxed, so i tend to avoid conflict.

this model, not working well (i am not saying wrong either), i learned a lot during my learning process at Grad school, I had changed my team more than 8 times, and learning a lot about people character, and what hole that i can fill to make things works. and i now understand that education quality is matters,

when i was in university, student not being push to ask and give strange question or where my friend who always go into International school and lived in several countries, Ms.Johan, “a critical thinking” . but in PMBS, our score generated by questions, and peers feedback, i really fortune that during my grad school, i met smart and inspiring friend such as Sarah, Nurul, Vincent, Putra, and Bang Didit, they gave me plenty of honest and constructive feedback.

recently, In HK,  i had conversation with other HR Head, she spoke to me that i must not let company drive into their own plan, i must communicate my aspirations, since it will makes me able to really performs well.  it suddenly shift my mindset, about i must take everything given, because it is God blessing. what mindset that i had for years, is everything is given, or just luck.

People in here really push me to get what i want, to be what i wanna be, don’t be afraid. it could be cultural and values different, but during my networking pilgrimage in here, i start to believe that is true. it reminds me on Bible verse: “seek ye shall find”, i found it when i was in 20th, in Anand Khrisna Book, and i curious to find out full verse.

Ask, Seek, Knock

“Ask and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you. For everyone who asks receives; the one who seeks finds; and to the one who knocks, the door will be opened.


when i  learning about pluralism and universal values. suddenly those words just appear in my Path, from friends, and more frequent, it just sounds like de javu.maybe its my turn to knock.

3rd quarter live in Island of FINANCE

I start to love this city, the diversity, is something i adored. i started to gets traction to live in here, more people to know, and interesting way of seeing live.

i also adds Stanford and Berkeley,  when i learned about company that innovate, is from the Valley. and I also has new friends who study at Stanford, and its so inspiring about the way people openly interact each other. they really unique , smart and inspiring on its way.

i just feeling the joy of meeting many interesting people, and it possibly makes my focus shift, not change. those new things happening, is not changed me, but those people helps me to figure out what i am right now. but i must keep on going.

stops, will makes me no where,

recently i learned about strategic procrastination, hopefully i am on that mode. this week i read a book called One thing. internet has makes me do plenty non productive things, read newspaper, watch stock price, seeing social media. hwah, it seems i cant control my self. i thing the book will helps me to figure out, that i must be focus. i still learn to be focus. many distraction lately. hopefully it will be better for next 3 months.

Quarry Bay|Royal terrace|HK

June 8th 2016, 00.05




weather forecast that matters

in past 27 years, i infrequent concerned on weather. i believed 90% that it wont be rain. thus; i never go out and prepared for the rain. but i was wrong. geographic matters. in Tropical area, rain is frequent to happen but i always never think about it,, but not in sub tropical. and weather changes so fast; even cant predict possibility when it stop or will be heavier.

it not a big matters though, since in my phone equipped by weather forecast. but its like a soft skills, its there, but it not useful unless u use it. My tendency to think that everything will be happening as i planned, can be ruined by weather. where in business its call natural risk.

in Java, people do ask for “rain master” (the only term that i think cool for Pawang Hujan – whereas in Formula 1 it means a driver who have capability to race and win during rain), to avoid their big event (especially wedding), and the do lots of mystical things, such as  using java ancient calendar; such as avoid passed away date of male ancestor, the date of disposal of umbilical cord, or matches date between couple. where some others more magical, such as put the bride underwear on top of roof, put together Egg, Chili, and Onion and paper containing ancient spells and wrapped into white clothe, even the family prohibited to take bath a day before the big day. and the price of Rain Master could reach 2 Billion IDR.

but, those story, is a reminder to my self, to emphasize weather as a big factor in future. at the moment, i was too lazy to put weather as risk that imperative.

how can i adjust the sail if i only use intuition to adjust?

how can i weather the storm, if i never care about the weather?

this is what i called only focused on internal strength and disregard of external force. that can change how things going, then changed how the things played.

i think this writing come from my sloppy behavior, that i use my Tropical Mindset, not subtropical mindset. it seems that every changes in weather, i got terrible flu. in December and in April. where it’s a condition where the nature condition changes, from 30 degree into 8 degree, then from 8 degree into 22 degree. i was sloppy; for rarely bring umbrella even I know the apps said it will be rain, I thought i always can endure changes. fact, was not. i needed to go to doctor, I missed events I planned for long time, especially running events and cure my paranoia on learning to make a balanced sheet balance.

anyway, i know; probably skills that i need to learn in here, should be more serious than weather. How if there’s a cool thing such as weather forecast for our future, that would be interesting isn’t it? a tools to forecast what would you become on your 50th? with whom you will be with? or the face of your baby if you make it with someone? it will changed a lot, but is that interesting?

For me not, i like ad-venture (i slightly uncertain this is the correct words, since adventure should be like those in the national geographic hunting a crocodile, or easily moved to different places like 007 and missionary impossible- assumed it is only a condition where its a lot of appetite to know,understand, feel, see, (and all the 5 senses) something new), where certainty is not certain. i like the unpredictability, or incomplete information, to keep me feel interested on what things that will be happening time after time; but  deep inside; i do have strong reason to believe that what i venture in, is worth to pursue. the “worth”, then become so subjective.

I do understand, when people get older, tend to pursue certainty, predictability, and then come status quo. i don’t know, at the end of the day, i will be the first or the second. but i really enjoy the journey.

During the last two months, I’m starting to get the traction of living here. i did run more than 30K possibly 3 times. i spend around 6-7 hours doing trail run (i did sleep on the apex of the hills and walk when i tired when it not race), and it could be best tools to kills my time, enjoy scenery, and meeting exceptional runner at the same time. I have bimonthly weekend visit to the Central Library, where i can read my favorite magazines without pay anything, except transportation cost. it makes my day for the last 4 months feels so fast. Plenty of excitement when it comes into weekend. its an excitement too when it comes to weekday since JCI gets into 4.900 on last week, more exciting nights since more friends shares their story, aspirations, and knowledge during lunch and diner time.

Anyway my curiosity, this months i think leads to  some figures, which is T.P Rachmat, Sandiaga U, and Patric W, I watched their videos, and those people really excites me. i don’t know, but what they doing, seems interesting.

A. TP Rachmat on how he build his  Triputra when he got 55, and his regret, for not buying AI for $65 Mio at 1999. and how he construct concept to create a strong corporation with 3 formula:


1.  STRONG wind

2. Unique

3. Leverage

B. Sandiaga U for his perfect timing and the way he build Recapital; where he said that failure is part of succeed; and 5 years after what he said is really happening now. from woman equality, and avoid dependency on natural resource by build strong downstream business and SME enteprises.

C. Patric W, then become head of Chamber of Commerce for start-up, and his aspirations of free competition.

D. Tom L, on how he talk about sound outlook and optimism about the country.

after all, watching those videos really lit my spirit up.

it will be more adventure for 3  months to come; hopefully plans will be done exceptionally.

-Understand the weather, then you can weather the storm. understand the wind, and you can adjust the sail-

QB.Aprill 23rd





a single slip, that ruins

I fascinated by Chinese new year, by February 8, a moment where i ran for 25.67 KM wearing a red jacket to Cyberport 2. a destination that i imagined to be the things i will pursued on. I wasn’t expecting, that it was my last day to run; at least until this writing created.

First time of my life, my ankle  injured on the 3rd day of Lunar. not by a race, but because of a price tag of  a Birkenstock’s soles and listening navigation song by Mighty Mouth; that dilutes my concentration (and other imaginations i had). Sloppy, I wasn’t carefully watch my steps, on my way down through the small cubed stairs, in front of Kebab House 27 at Hollywood road to get a Wonton noodle, internet said, it would get me never ending fortunes for the rest of the year.

It was loud, “crack” voice, such a voice of Roma cracker being crunched without put it inside a hot milk.people tried to helps me by asking me for let them call ambulance, but i wasn’t expecting it would makes me handicapped.

My  ankle; swelling. tripled its normal curve. I still continued to eat noodle. since my purpose was to eat noodle.

a week before, i talked to my friend that we must stick to the plan, even terrible things happen. being inflexible and stick to the plan even things goes wrong could be fun, it was a perfect Wonton Noodle anyway. I ate while withstanding the pain.

I went to Doctor the day after, the roentgen result shown my bones is fine, but ligament, wrecked; need 10 days to recover, the doctor said. and i believed it. and today is the 20th days; getting better but it still psychologically gain its confidence back, and difficult for perfect praying movement.

Yesterday, i represented my company. a 15 KM trail run (its a hike anyway since it was only 10 minnutes/km. finally i ran again for the first time, but slow. and it was boring to be slow. i couldn’t jump or maneuver along the way. not going run, for days made me felt unfulfilled, loosing a habit.

i grateful the importance of my feet, as my asset to create value, where i can get stress and mental release during exercise session.

No point for regret, it is a warning; from the Lord, not too put 100% trust on fortune teller said about doing things; eventually if the fortune teller is from the internet. I consulted with my mandarin teacher, that it was only a stereotype to do those things.

Its fun to make ludicrous of our self isn’t it. Doing things that misaligned with main purpose, what i my equity analyst friend called a random walk. like Dharmagandul said, The Chinese was too smart that it creates varies of letter and font, while Javanese not develop that, but develop Budhi. but i did something that i believed i had to do; driven by curiosity, guts, and good intention. which I convinced (more than before); it made from perseverance and consistency; not by a bowl noodle, red clothes, and clean up the house with wet clothes that i did.

actually i had some misfortune at Chinese new year, where my credit card stolen (or possibly tumbled) during my running session, and it was my fault not to follow my instinct to put it in my 2XU pant.i must have been more careful thereafter.

February is so bumpy. many misfortunes happened. i don’t know what kind of Karma i had, but i believed i did something wrong. my mind and body was not well in sync. and i start to belief on my self alert more than before. If you are in Doubt, Better not do, and evaluate thoroughly. sounds rhetoric.

today is a leap year. talking about a leap, i remember one of my conversation with my friend, on what i could do after i return in Jakarta. i barely have no Idea on what i can do or achieve later on, i only able to improve my self, sharpening my saw. related to result, we never know. people talk about leap, i talk about orchestrating improvement that enhance my capability to be on par with those whom i admired.

life is not like invest in a stock portfolio, which we can hedge the risks by diversification, and waiting long term return that generated by earning per share.

life is a Venture. if you like, buy and manage, and reap the return. if you don’t like, exit.

it could be mystify if there’s plenty venture opportunity anyway.

so, do you think stocks portfolio and Venture is tantamount? never mind, but do protect your asset, especially if it creates return that leads you to your destination(s)

QB. 23.59 2016|2|29th My Way, Frank Sinatra